Whens Too Soon To Move In Together?

If you’ve been contemplating moving in together then you’re probably in a really great place with your relationship and that’s wonderful. But before you go shacking up with your main squeeze you might want to read this first.

Many who divorce have baggage they carry into their new relationships. And many who find new partners may live together, but they don't remarry. (Beto Alvarez/Philadelphia Inquirer/MCT)

 

There is no such thing as an absolute in any relationship. Every princess and prince charming is a human being which means they, just like you, are susceptible to everyday life. They have stresses weighing down on them, they get sick and grumpy, they poop! If you don’t know it already, everybody goes through the same types of hardships in a modern day life so it’s important to understand that before jumping into your very own fairytale. Here are a few suggestions you might want to try out before making cohabitation official.

 

Try it on for size first

Before you pack it all up and divide space in your new place between you and them, you might want to spend extended periods of time together first. Plan a weekend here and there, spend time over at each other’s places for a few months and see how it goes.

If you have the opportunity to shack up together for a week or two (consider planning around vacations and such) then it might be in your favor to give it a shot. The more time you spend in each other’s presence in “that way” the more you’ll get a true taste for what it’ll actually be like to truly move in together for the long haul.

This tip also comes in handy if you perhaps have a sneaking suspicion that your significant other might be hiding something. It would be much easier to take a peek at their phone, or convince them to “let you use it real fast because your battery is dead” so you could maybe jot down some numbers.. or take a quick screen-shot of their contacts lists and txt it to yourself. Just be sure to delete the evidence immediately!

 

Once you have that contact list you can head over to THIS LINK for some detective work.

 

Prepare to share just about everything

It really doesn’t matter if you’ve been in a relationship for 6 months or years, it all is going to change when you two move in together. You can kiss all that wonderful personal space goodbye, and your privacy… that’s all but completely gone too.

It won’t be long until your “you” routine transitions into an “our” routine. He’ll be in that bathroom with you brushing his teeth as you apply your detoxifying mask. He bursts out laughing saying things like he didn’t know he was shacking up with the neighborhood swamp monster. You’ll poke him and try to smear some on anywhere you can manage and next thing you know the playful roughhousing begins. He’ll embrace you in a messy kiss, just the lips though… he still has paste in his mouth.

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It may be difficult getting over the little things at first, but eventually routine will set in and it’ll all just become the way it is. That’s why it’s important to be absolutely sure this is what you truly want because once it’s done things become much more difficult to simply “like it or lump it.”

 

Set realistic expectations

Here’s the straight talk. Moving in with your partner isn’t going to fix a darn thing by the simple act of cohabitation. Sure, rent might be cheaper for the pair of you thanks to splitting the tab, but the reality is that you’ll be sharing a space with them which means you’ll have nowhere to hide your baggage.

 

Your money problems, any personal turmoil you might be facing, any of the typical day to day issues we all face, they’ll all still be there. Sure, you’ll now have someone else you can depend on, and in return they should be able to equally depend on you, but you should be prepared to deal with life as it comes regardless.

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Pick your battles very wisely

This is probably one of the more important on the list which is why it’s last. Look, the suggestion here isn’t to simply let everything slide, after all it’s not like you’re anybody’s doormat. That said though, you do need to be sure to not just flare up an argument where the two of you will be estranged from each other for days or even weeks; nobody is going to benefit from that. This person is your partner in life and you need to work things out together- your happiness and sanity depends on it.

Don’t forget that you’re both full grown adults, treat each other as such. Nobody wants to feel like a child being scolded, that’s just ridiculous. If there is a small issue but it’s perhaps repetitious then let them know about it, come to some kind of reasonable agreement. If the issue is large and looming then it needs to be nipped in the bud as soon as possible before it grows out of hand. Do so in a calm and delegated manor.

 

One final consideration before you move in together

Some relationships are destined to end in happily ever after while others are eventually going to get bumpy and potentially crumble, that’s just the unfortunate reality of it.

If you think for just a second that you might have something to reconsider in your partner then it may serve you well to check it out. Running a check on them just in good faith could be a positive reinforcement in the right direction.

 

If you’d like more details on just what I’m going on about then head over to THIS LINK HERE.

 

Or simply click on the image below… the purpose of this tool is to catch a cheating spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend, but it has so many more uses- Especially the background check which you can find on the page so give it a look over if you need to and I wish you all the best going forward.

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