Is your spouse having a secret affair?

Like every other love tale, getting to meet your heart mate is a feeling that can never be compared to another. And while some of us sadly end up not marrying each other, the rest of us get to finally tie the knot in holy matrimony. And as it often turns out, we always get to enjoy the comfort and palatable, ranging from the surprise gifts, cuddling, care, the affection that marriage has to offer at the initial years. Then before you know it, a couple of years later, things start changing. The whole “Cutie Pie” name seems to just vanish into thin air.

As a matter of fact, I do receive a lot of emails as to why and how this happens, and the interesting part is, the complains are mostly made by women.

And a major percentage of the emails are always centered on the theme of, “how do I get to know if my husband is actually cheating on me”. So today, we will be pondering on this issue of how to know if your husband is actually cheating or if the problem is coming from your own end as the lady.


The Union Theory

Alright, there is something most of we the married people fail to understand.  In every union between a man and a woman, there is always this theory of depreciation. Now, how does this come in you may ask? If you must notice, every sort of suspicions in the husbands always comes after some years of one’s marriage, at least for most of us. And this never happened in the first few years because your value never depreciated in his eyes at the time.


There is this unique thing about men that we women need to understand, and that is the fact that “men need renewal in almost every phenomenon” This is why they are always out to seek for motivation before engaging in any particular activity.  You hear them say things like, why should I go to the cinema when I can just go take a walk. Now, as a wife, if you give him the reason to, then he’ll forfeit going for the walk into going to the cinema with you.  So, on knowing this, how then can you tell when he starts drifting outside the relationship intimately.


A Bull in A China’s Shop

This is the very first thing you’ll notice. He will start acting awkward in ways that he never did. The thing about men is the fact that they can be read easily. If he is worried, sad, hiding something, you will certainly know if you pay close attention.


Chief Complaint

All of a sudden your sandwich starts tasting salty or like a 3 weeks forgotten bakery. If you notice this, then chances are that he is probably eating somewhere from another lady’s pot.


The Night Walker

This is mostly applicable to the working class husbands. If he starts coming home late than usual, then there is someone somewhere who is always keeping him that late after work. And believe me, it’s no good for your relationship.

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Eye Contact

Yes, this is often common in most men. And it’s one of the best ways of knowing if he is actually doing something funny. If you talk to him and he can’t maintain eye contact like before, then he is certainly hiding something.


Short Convos

If he is always looking for a way to end a discussion whenever you bring one up by either walking out on you or scolding you, then chances are that you’re no longer the apple of his eyes.


Indirect Convos

If he starts communicating with you through the kids, then he is actually probably up to something. For instance, sending the kids to tell you to prepare dinner for him by 8 pm.



Most men know that whenever they have sexual intercourse with another lady other than their wives, on getting home, that their wife will certainly perceive or see the strange things on them like an unfamiliar feminine smell, a lipstick or a hair follicle. So in a bid to prevent that, the man will start hesitating for the wife to handle his laundries. If you notice this, then something is certainly up.

In brief, there are a plethora of signs to know a cheating spouse, however, it is important to note that marriage is a two-way channel, he might be cheating on you because of you. Perhaps because you’ve stopped being the sexy, attractive, smelling nice lady he used to know. So from time to time, try hitting the gym, wearing attractive clothes at home, walk on your manners, and you’ll be surprised at the positive response you’ll get from your spouse.


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